October 1, 2012

Soft or Strong

With a new baby and mom and dad back at school there are some big changes happening at the Kerr house. One of the big changes is simply in how the kids are cared for. This semester my classes are 100% online. E however spends about thirty hours a week at school and another thirty hours a week at work which means instead of splitting parenting jobs so I take care of the kids during the day and E does so at night, I am taking on more of a twenty-four-seven role so E can get some homework done when he finally does get home at night.
One place this is really showing is in the discipline the boys receive. In the past I have been what E calls “the soft one” because I like to give second chances and encourage the kids to behave rather than disciplining them harshly when they do something wrong. One big reason for this is that for about half of the last five years I have been pregnant which, for me, means little to no lifting and changes the way I deal with life altogether.
E, on the other hand, is a much stronger disciplinarian. Not to say that he is mean, because he's not, but he is much more willing, and able, to physically help the boys along by lifting them to get them where they are supposed to be or physically putting them on time out, a place they really don't like to go.
As a mom I really don't have a problem with either discipline style. In fact, both are needed in our home because a strong approach leaves B in tears every time but a soft approach has no effect on C and he will completely ignore you unless you physically get his attention. This is why, as a mom, I am working to better use both techniques so that I can better care for and teach my children. It would be nice if you could pick one technique and that it would work for everyone but, since we're human, we know that is not the case and I'm so glad we have the choice between soft and strong every time we need to discipline someone we love.
I am also so glad we get to choose between soft and strong in other choices in our life, like our choice in bathroom tissue. Charmin has been so nice to give us this wonderful choice because as we well know the same thing doesn't work for everyone.

I was compensated for this blog post as part of the SocialMoms and Charmin blogging program. The opinions and ideas expressed here are my own. For more blog posts on this topic, click here.

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